Nov. 19, 2025

Dr Denise Brown on The Authors Alley with Dori DeCarlo

Dr Denise Brown on The Authors Alley with Dori DeCarlo
Dr Denise Brown on The Authors Alley with Dori DeCarlo
Word of Mom Radio
Dr Denise Brown on The Authors Alley with Dori DeCarlo

Dr. Denise Brown shares the book that gives you the prescription to a good life!

Spotify podcast player badge
iHeartRadio podcast player badge
Amazon Music podcast player badge
Apple Podcasts podcast player badge
Pandora podcast player badge
Youtube Music podcast player badge
PlayerFM podcast player badge
Overcast podcast player badge
PocketCasts podcast player badge
Goodpods podcast player badge
Podyssey podcast player badge
Audible podcast player badge
Podchaser podcast player badge
RSS Feed podcast player badge
Spotify podcast player iconiHeartRadio podcast player iconAmazon Music podcast player iconApple Podcasts podcast player iconPandora podcast player iconYoutube Music podcast player iconPlayerFM podcast player iconOvercast podcast player iconPocketCasts podcast player iconGoodpods podcast player iconPodyssey podcast player iconAudible podcast player iconPodchaser podcast player iconRSS Feed podcast player icon
Season 13The Mompreneur ModelThe Authors Alley

With over three decades of experience in healthcare as a physician, CEO and Chief Strategy Officer, Dr. Denise Brown is a transformative leader who helps women in business learn how to prioritize and avoid maternal overwhelm. A thought leader in self-care activities for women, she brings her expertise to books for successful women. A graduate of The University of Chicago's Pritzker School of Medicine, with training at Stanford and Vanderbilt, she lives with Alex, her childhood sweetheart of 28 years, and their sons Will and Hank.

Dr. Denise is a unicorn in the field of venture capital – a transformative leader who is also a trailblazing physician and committed mom. On the Rushmore of multidisciplinary doctors, she’s right up there with Dre, Pepper, and Oz. Her rare amount of successful experience fosters a confidence and exuberance to her perspective. Dr. Denise loves exploring thought-provoking topics like Why achieving ‘work-life balance’ doesn’t fix dissatisfaction, How successful women can succeed sustainably, and Why you can actually have it all. Right now.

Join host Dori DeCarlo on The Authors Alley and connect with Dr. Denise at DeniseBrownMD.com and TheFairyGoddoctor.com and on LinkedIn and Instagram and get her book Fairy God Doctor’s Guide to a Good Life.

Please support UnsilencedVoices.org a global 501(c)3 nonprofit that empowers survivors of domestic violence, sexual assault, and human trafficking.

We thank Smith Sisters and the Sunday Drivers for our theme song, "She is You".

Be sure to connect with us and come tell us your story!

WordofMomRadio.com - sharing the wisdom of women, in business and in life.

Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/word-of-mom-radio--5252572/support.

WEBVTT

1
00:00:00.280 --> 00:00:03.319
She is sure, she is true, she is straw is straw,

2
00:00:03.399 --> 00:00:08.599
she is true, is true, she is praise, pray, is

3
00:00:09.839 --> 00:00:10.439
she is you.

4
00:00:10.800 --> 00:00:14.720
Hello, everyone, Welcome to today's Word of Mom Radio Here

5
00:00:14.759 --> 00:00:17.760
on the Word of Mom Media Network. I'm your host,

6
00:00:18.120 --> 00:00:20.600
Dory d Carlo, and you know we are here week

7
00:00:20.640 --> 00:00:25.600
after week, show after show, breaking those myths that mompreneurs

8
00:00:25.640 --> 00:00:28.879
and business women, especially those of us building our businesses

9
00:00:28.920 --> 00:00:31.760
from home, that we're just dabbling in between bake sales

10
00:00:31.800 --> 00:00:33.119
and getting our nails done.

11
00:00:33.359 --> 00:00:33.679
We're not.

12
00:00:34.439 --> 00:00:37.119
We are smart, we are savvy, and we are sharing

13
00:00:37.159 --> 00:00:40.600
the wisdom of women in business and in life. And

14
00:00:40.640 --> 00:00:43.799
I'm looking forward to bringing today's guests into our author's

15
00:00:43.880 --> 00:00:44.960
ali and.

16
00:00:45.240 --> 00:00:46.640
Kind of momentrepreneur model.

17
00:00:46.679 --> 00:00:48.039
I mean, we're going to have to just do this

18
00:00:48.159 --> 00:00:51.520
over a few different realms here on Word of Mom.

19
00:00:52.200 --> 00:00:55.920
With over three decades of experience and healthcare as a position,

20
00:00:56.520 --> 00:01:02.200
CEO and Chief Strategy Officer, Denise Brown is a transformative

21
00:01:02.320 --> 00:01:06.359
leader who helps women in business learn how to prioritize

22
00:01:06.359 --> 00:01:10.959
and aboard maternal overwhelm. A thought leader in self care

23
00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:15.280
activities for women, she brings her expertise to books for

24
00:01:15.400 --> 00:01:20.000
successful women. A graduate of the University of Chicago's Printzfurgh

25
00:01:20.040 --> 00:01:24.439
School of Medicine, with training at Stanford and Vanderbilt. She

26
00:01:24.519 --> 00:01:27.560
lives with Alex, her childhood sweetheart of twenty eight years,

27
00:01:27.560 --> 00:01:30.840
and their son's Will and Hanks. Doctor Denise is a

28
00:01:30.959 --> 00:01:35.120
unicorn in the field of venture capital, a transformative leader

29
00:01:35.159 --> 00:01:39.359
who is also a trail blinked and physician and committed mom.

30
00:01:40.400 --> 00:01:45.599
On the rushmore of multidisciplinary doctors, She's right up there

31
00:01:45.599 --> 00:01:48.920
with dre Pepper and Oz for Red or Not and

32
00:01:49.079 --> 00:01:54.079
successful Experience. Foster's a confidence and exuberance.

33
00:01:53.680 --> 00:01:54.959
To her perspective.

34
00:01:55.760 --> 00:02:01.040
Doctor Denise loves exploring thought provoking topics like why achieving

35
00:02:01.159 --> 00:02:07.159
work life balance doesn't fix dissatisfaction, how successful women can

36
00:02:07.200 --> 00:02:13.840
successfully succeed sustainability, and why you can actually have it

37
00:02:13.879 --> 00:02:16.840
all right now. And I can keep talking about her,

38
00:02:16.879 --> 00:02:19.560
but I can't wait to bring her in. So Doctor Denise,

39
00:02:19.639 --> 00:02:21.159
Welcome to Word of Mom Radio.

40
00:02:21.759 --> 00:02:23.479
I'm so excited to be here, yay.

41
00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:25.800
I know, I'm thrilled to have you, and I would

42
00:02:25.840 --> 00:02:29.360
love for you to take us on your journey because

43
00:02:29.360 --> 00:02:32.919
it's quite a unique journey to go from physician to

44
00:02:33.039 --> 00:02:36.120
CEO and strategy officer and all of the different things

45
00:02:36.120 --> 00:02:37.759
that you're doing, so take us on.

46
00:02:38.879 --> 00:02:42.000
Yeah, you know, I think the real key to it

47
00:02:42.039 --> 00:02:44.000
all is you never know what's going to happen till

48
00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:46.080
you're right in the middle of it, so you might

49
00:02:46.120 --> 00:02:50.240
as well enjoy the ride. I started off my journey

50
00:02:50.280 --> 00:02:52.599
in a very kind of traditional way. I you know,

51
00:02:52.680 --> 00:02:55.120
went to college and then went to medical school and

52
00:02:56.000 --> 00:02:58.680
kind of saw the track right before my eyes and

53
00:02:58.759 --> 00:03:00.639
I was just going to get on it, roll right

54
00:03:00.680 --> 00:03:01.520
on down the road.

55
00:03:02.159 --> 00:03:03.520
And then, you know, things happen.

56
00:03:03.800 --> 00:03:06.199
Life kind of gives you a little shoulder nudge and

57
00:03:06.560 --> 00:03:08.199
you've got a kind of bob and weave, and I

58
00:03:08.199 --> 00:03:10.879
think there's a lot of opportunity to sort of either

59
00:03:10.919 --> 00:03:13.599
decide to be overwhelmed by that when life kind of

60
00:03:13.680 --> 00:03:16.360
reaches up and gives you a little slap, or you.

61
00:03:16.319 --> 00:03:18.319
Can kind of go with the flow. And I ended

62
00:03:18.400 --> 00:03:19.159
up doing that.

63
00:03:19.240 --> 00:03:22.800
So I had a mentality of always say yes, and

64
00:03:22.840 --> 00:03:25.560
then as I got older, it was always say yes

65
00:03:25.759 --> 00:03:26.159
and then.

66
00:03:26.120 --> 00:03:27.759
Ask a lot of clarifying questions.

67
00:03:27.800 --> 00:03:32.719
But I started a practice for myself because I didn't

68
00:03:32.840 --> 00:03:35.919
like the job offers that I received, and I thought, well.

69
00:03:35.759 --> 00:03:38.759
I'll just do it on my own. Then, but I'll

70
00:03:38.759 --> 00:03:40.439
find other people to help me along the way.

71
00:03:40.479 --> 00:03:43.199
And so I grew a fairly successful practice that I

72
00:03:43.319 --> 00:03:47.280
then rolled into a much larger physician organization, and that

73
00:03:47.319 --> 00:03:50.400
took about five or six years, and then I just

74
00:03:50.479 --> 00:03:53.680
kind of did my thing under this bigger umbrella because

75
00:03:53.879 --> 00:03:55.479
they could do a lot of the kind of back

76
00:03:55.520 --> 00:03:57.680
office stuff for me. I didn't have to stress out

77
00:03:57.680 --> 00:04:01.280
about it so much. But by little got more kind

78
00:04:01.319 --> 00:04:04.000
of sucked into the business of what we were doing,

79
00:04:04.080 --> 00:04:08.639
and wanting not to have other people make decisions for me,

80
00:04:08.800 --> 00:04:11.120
but rather be the one kind of you know, seated

81
00:04:11.159 --> 00:04:14.120
at the table deciding what direction to take.

82
00:04:14.159 --> 00:04:15.840
And and that's how I ended up.

83
00:04:15.759 --> 00:04:18.480
Getting more into kind of a business development type of

84
00:04:18.560 --> 00:04:22.319
role with this organization that ultimately you're a few years

85
00:04:22.319 --> 00:04:25.079
down the line, and it ended up at the chief

86
00:04:25.120 --> 00:04:30.439
strategy position, really taking this company that had been somewhat

87
00:04:30.480 --> 00:04:34.079
regional and you know, doing great but not really thinking

88
00:04:34.160 --> 00:04:37.240
expansively to then kind of taking.

89
00:04:37.000 --> 00:04:38.839
On the world and did really, really well.

90
00:04:38.879 --> 00:04:42.399
And then I got recruited away by a private equity

91
00:04:42.399 --> 00:04:46.519
company to go be the CEO another healthcare group.

92
00:04:47.199 --> 00:04:48.480
And at the time I was like, oh, I.

93
00:04:48.399 --> 00:04:51.079
Don't know, but sounds interesting, and I just kind of

94
00:04:51.160 --> 00:04:53.519
was like, sure, let me, let me give it a rip. So,

95
00:04:54.959 --> 00:04:57.279
you know, if there's an overarching theme, I think a

96
00:04:57.360 --> 00:05:00.959
lot of women are paralyzed by oh I don't know

97
00:05:01.079 --> 00:05:04.240
enough yet, or I haven't done that before, so I

98
00:05:04.279 --> 00:05:06.600
should probably say no, I'm not quite ready.

99
00:05:07.480 --> 00:05:08.879
That's never been my problem.

100
00:05:08.920 --> 00:05:10.600
I was kind of like, I'll build it while I

101
00:05:10.680 --> 00:05:12.800
fly it, and I'll figure it out. And if I

102
00:05:12.839 --> 00:05:15.600
can't figure it out, I can find the people who can.

103
00:05:15.480 --> 00:05:16.920
Help me figure it out for me.

104
00:05:17.000 --> 00:05:19.360
So that sort of ended up kind of in a

105
00:05:20.160 --> 00:05:22.680
wacky journey to now where I'm at, where I sit

106
00:05:23.800 --> 00:05:26.959
on a as a general partner of an investment fund

107
00:05:27.399 --> 00:05:30.439
to try to help find other cool things out there in.

108
00:05:30.360 --> 00:05:34.160
The world, all kind of health related. But it's been a.

109
00:05:34.079 --> 00:05:37.879
Really interesting evolution that I absolutely never would have predicted

110
00:05:38.079 --> 00:05:39.120
in a million years.

111
00:05:39.199 --> 00:05:40.319
I never would have predicted it.

112
00:05:41.439 --> 00:05:45.199
I love it. It's so funny because, as you were saying,

113
00:05:45.360 --> 00:05:49.399
men will fill out a job application, they might be

114
00:05:49.519 --> 00:05:52.680
forty percent qualified for it, and they have that exact

115
00:05:53.240 --> 00:05:55.560
you know, I'll learn it as they go along. Women

116
00:05:55.720 --> 00:05:59.839
wait until we feel like we have every single qualification.

117
00:06:00.360 --> 00:06:04.439
So I love that we are learning and you are

118
00:06:04.600 --> 00:06:09.199
preaching and sharing with your life with your book, that know,

119
00:06:10.360 --> 00:06:12.800
because you're right, you can build it as you're flying.

120
00:06:12.920 --> 00:06:15.439
And if you can figure it out, there are other

121
00:06:15.600 --> 00:06:16.439
people who can.

122
00:06:16.920 --> 00:06:18.199
That's why you're a good CEO.

123
00:06:18.800 --> 00:06:19.160
Yeah.

124
00:06:19.199 --> 00:06:22.759
Well, and then I think that's really an important kind

125
00:06:22.800 --> 00:06:25.439
of revelation if you will. I mean, I'm old now,

126
00:06:26.199 --> 00:06:28.279
and so I I you know, you sort of learn

127
00:06:28.360 --> 00:06:30.519
these things as you get, you know, kind of get.

128
00:06:30.399 --> 00:06:33.680
Your battle scars and your gray hairs. But I was

129
00:06:33.759 --> 00:06:36.680
I was actually playing majong with some friends who are in.

130
00:06:36.680 --> 00:06:40.120
Their late thirties yesterday and they were talking about exactly this. Well,

131
00:06:40.360 --> 00:06:42.120
I want to apply for this, but I don't. I'm

132
00:06:42.160 --> 00:06:44.199
not sure I have the experience yet. And I was like, oh,

133
00:06:44.279 --> 00:06:45.319
we're going to stop right there.

134
00:06:46.759 --> 00:06:48.319
You don't need to have the experience yet.

135
00:06:48.399 --> 00:06:50.519
You need to have the sort of gumption you need

136
00:06:50.519 --> 00:06:53.120
to have the ability to kind of go after it

137
00:06:53.279 --> 00:06:56.120
and to figure it out as you do. You know,

138
00:06:56.199 --> 00:06:59.279
it's like quite honestly being a mom, like you can't

139
00:06:59.319 --> 00:07:03.120
know everything. It's highly unpredictable, right, but you just got

140
00:07:03.120 --> 00:07:05.680
to keep showing up day after day, and it turns

141
00:07:05.720 --> 00:07:08.199
out that you know, you actually have everything you need

142
00:07:08.240 --> 00:07:11.439
to pull it off. So so that's definitely been the

143
00:07:11.480 --> 00:07:15.279
sort of theme of my life. Yes, and I need

144
00:07:15.319 --> 00:07:18.160
to know a little bit more detail that came later.

145
00:07:19.240 --> 00:07:20.759
Do you have a life's motto?

146
00:07:21.279 --> 00:07:21.439
Oh?

147
00:07:21.519 --> 00:07:23.839
Yes, My life's motto is you can have it all,

148
00:07:24.240 --> 00:07:25.360
you just can't do it all.

149
00:07:25.920 --> 00:07:28.120
Wow, say that one again.

150
00:07:29.399 --> 00:07:32.639
You can have it all, but you cannot do it all.

151
00:07:34.680 --> 00:07:36.720
I yay, you know.

152
00:07:36.839 --> 00:07:40.759
And it's so funny as a woman who you know,

153
00:07:40.839 --> 00:07:45.160
I coach and different things like that. It's listening to

154
00:07:45.240 --> 00:07:49.639
other women not wanting to promote somebody else because they

155
00:07:49.680 --> 00:07:52.600
do the same kind of the same thing. I'm a

156
00:07:52.879 --> 00:07:55.079
mindset coach. I couldn't coach.

157
00:07:55.120 --> 00:07:56.920
I don't even want to coach all the people that

158
00:07:57.000 --> 00:07:57.959
need by said training.

159
00:07:58.639 --> 00:08:01.639
That's why there are a hundred's and hundreds and thousands

160
00:08:01.639 --> 00:08:04.720
of us out there, because not everybody is gonna You're

161
00:08:04.720 --> 00:08:09.279
not their cuple of teams. It's like podcasts. I share

162
00:08:09.439 --> 00:08:13.399
women and their podcasts all the time. I have interviewed

163
00:08:13.959 --> 00:08:18.959
hundreds of podcasters. I've been asked to their shows twice, right,

164
00:08:19.600 --> 00:08:22.000
because oh what if they we fall into that high

165
00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:25.079
school mentality? What if I you're gonna steal my boyfriend.

166
00:08:25.199 --> 00:08:28.199
What if they like you more than they like me. Guys,

167
00:08:28.199 --> 00:08:31.360
don't think about that. No, Joe doesn't care if you

168
00:08:31.480 --> 00:08:35.399
golf with Charlie as long as you're giving him your business.

169
00:08:36.200 --> 00:08:37.200
You know, think about it.

170
00:08:37.840 --> 00:08:38.799
You are so precked.

171
00:08:38.919 --> 00:08:40.240
Yeah, to a formal event.

172
00:08:40.440 --> 00:08:43.360
There are six tuxedos that guys can rent unless they

173
00:08:43.399 --> 00:08:45.240
go for like the blue or the plat or whatever.

174
00:08:46.039 --> 00:08:48.519
So they're all dressed the same, they'll have a different

175
00:08:48.519 --> 00:08:51.440
colored tie or cumber bun. Imagine a woman walking in

176
00:08:51.440 --> 00:08:56.080
in your dress. Unless you're the entertainment on that stage.

177
00:08:56.159 --> 00:09:00.000
You're gonna flip if another woman is in your dress.

178
00:09:00.679 --> 00:09:03.679
And so because let's maybe you know, we as girls,

179
00:09:03.759 --> 00:09:05.879
let's say you know, we are in an older generation.

180
00:09:06.360 --> 00:09:08.440
We were taught to be smart, but not too smart

181
00:09:09.000 --> 00:09:11.240
because you know, you don't want to intimidate the man

182
00:09:11.279 --> 00:09:13.960
around you, and you want to let them have their

183
00:09:14.000 --> 00:09:18.240
way and all of these things that were ingrained in us.

184
00:09:18.440 --> 00:09:20.720
Yeah, as girl, you know what, No.

185
00:09:23.480 --> 00:09:24.919
Yeah, I mean a lot of that. You got to

186
00:09:25.000 --> 00:09:27.000
unlearn a lot of that because I think you're right.

187
00:09:27.039 --> 00:09:29.720
We I mean, I'm firmly gen x.

188
00:09:30.480 --> 00:09:31.279
You know, we were.

189
00:09:31.200 --> 00:09:33.559
Kind of told that we could do everything, that the

190
00:09:33.600 --> 00:09:35.720
world was our oyster, but then you had to be real,

191
00:09:36.120 --> 00:09:39.759
real careful about all of the very sensitive others around you.

192
00:09:40.200 --> 00:09:42.360
And I think that kind of set us up to,

193
00:09:42.879 --> 00:09:45.600
you know, in a disservice. And for the older exers,

194
00:09:45.840 --> 00:09:48.799
we really screwed the pooch with our daughters, right because

195
00:09:49.080 --> 00:09:50.519
you know, now all of a sudden, we have these

196
00:09:50.600 --> 00:09:53.440
kind of competing interests and so, yeah, you can run

197
00:09:53.440 --> 00:09:56.919
around and be superwoman and then be incredibly burnt out

198
00:09:56.960 --> 00:09:59.600
by the time you're forty five and kind of useless,

199
00:10:00.440 --> 00:10:03.039
or be an empty husk where you don't actually know

200
00:10:03.080 --> 00:10:06.399
who you are. You've been so busy serving others at

201
00:10:06.399 --> 00:10:08.759
work or at home or wherever that you have no

202
00:10:08.919 --> 00:10:12.559
idea who you yourself, you know, what really actually matters

203
00:10:12.600 --> 00:10:15.679
to you. And so you know, it's a lot of

204
00:10:15.799 --> 00:10:19.000
kind of like unlearning all of those sorts of behaviors.

205
00:10:19.000 --> 00:10:21.360
And that's why I say you really can have it all,

206
00:10:22.480 --> 00:10:25.000
but you really have to understand what that all means.

207
00:10:25.120 --> 00:10:29.000
And that's the kind of candid dialogue that you have

208
00:10:29.080 --> 00:10:33.000
to have with yourself because it's really easy to listen

209
00:10:33.039 --> 00:10:36.080
to what society or TikTok or Instagram or whatever you

210
00:10:36.120 --> 00:10:39.039
know says we're supposed to have, but the word supposed

211
00:10:39.039 --> 00:10:43.559
to is you know, total garbage. What actually matters to

212
00:10:43.840 --> 00:10:48.000
you personally and what are you willing to do to

213
00:10:48.159 --> 00:10:51.039
kind of protect and defend that? And so I think

214
00:10:51.120 --> 00:10:55.480
it requires like some honesty, it requires clarity, and then

215
00:10:55.600 --> 00:11:02.320
ultimately really requires savagery to kind of make sure that

216
00:11:02.320 --> 00:11:03.720
that is what you're.

217
00:11:03.600 --> 00:11:04.600
Working towards it.

218
00:11:04.679 --> 00:11:09.200
There's a ferocity that is needed in order to kind

219
00:11:09.200 --> 00:11:12.360
of defend what that all really is. And when you

220
00:11:12.440 --> 00:11:16.919
start thinking that way, then you recognize how much you

221
00:11:17.039 --> 00:11:20.200
do have to rely on all of these other people

222
00:11:20.240 --> 00:11:23.720
around you. And if you don't have that village or whatever,

223
00:11:23.759 --> 00:11:25.399
then you need to go out and create it.

224
00:11:25.840 --> 00:11:27.639
And I talk a lot about that in my book

225
00:11:27.679 --> 00:11:28.559
about how.

226
00:11:28.519 --> 00:11:30.679
Yeah, you just cannot do it all. You have to

227
00:11:30.720 --> 00:11:33.639
rely on other people. Who are those people? Where do

228
00:11:33.679 --> 00:11:35.639
you find them? You got to go out and look

229
00:11:35.639 --> 00:11:37.519
for them. They don't just land in your lap. You know,

230
00:11:37.559 --> 00:11:41.159
it requires some action on our parts to kind of

231
00:11:41.159 --> 00:11:45.000
make that happen. And then once you sort of do that, well,

232
00:11:45.039 --> 00:11:47.000
now you kind of start, you know, really cooking with

233
00:11:47.120 --> 00:11:50.039
gas and it turns out to be a lot of fun.

234
00:11:50.200 --> 00:11:54.360
So what would you tell your younger self if you

235
00:11:54.399 --> 00:11:55.559
could go back.

236
00:11:55.879 --> 00:11:58.200
You know, I mean this is going to sound weird

237
00:11:59.159 --> 00:12:02.600
in that, and maybe fortunate isn't the right word. But

238
00:12:02.679 --> 00:12:06.320
I lost my mom just right as I was I

239
00:12:06.399 --> 00:12:10.279
guess I was twenty four, and it was horrible but

240
00:12:10.480 --> 00:12:13.039
also the greatest thing that ever happened to me, because

241
00:12:13.240 --> 00:12:17.120
it was a kind of a fast forward to the

242
00:12:17.159 --> 00:12:19.720
age of giving zero fux. I think I was a

243
00:12:19.759 --> 00:12:26.559
classic eldest daughter. I held myself to a ridiculously unnecessary standard, right,

244
00:12:27.000 --> 00:12:29.120
Like I couldn't just get all a's. They had to

245
00:12:29.159 --> 00:12:31.480
be A plus's. I couldn't get, you know, like I

246
00:12:32.000 --> 00:12:32.919
had to be the.

247
00:12:32.879 --> 00:12:35.840
Top, the best, the estest, whatever it was.

248
00:12:36.360 --> 00:12:39.879
I think I sort of followed in my mother's footsteps

249
00:12:39.919 --> 00:12:40.120
of that.

250
00:12:40.240 --> 00:12:40.440
Right.

251
00:12:40.440 --> 00:12:43.320
She was this career woman. She was really amazing. I mean,

252
00:12:43.360 --> 00:12:46.799
she was actually the most awesome human. But I had

253
00:12:46.799 --> 00:12:49.919
this kind of unnatural sort of sense that I had

254
00:12:49.919 --> 00:12:50.840
to be perfect.

255
00:12:51.480 --> 00:12:53.480
And then when she died, I was like, Okay, well

256
00:12:53.519 --> 00:12:53.960
she was.

257
00:12:54.240 --> 00:12:58.240
Perfect, and look what good did that do her? You know, like,

258
00:12:58.279 --> 00:13:00.919
maybe I need to reconsider this a little bit. And

259
00:13:01.000 --> 00:13:03.399
so I think that really helped. You know, I'm not

260
00:13:03.440 --> 00:13:06.440
saying it was great from the get go, but I

261
00:13:06.519 --> 00:13:08.679
kind of I feel like I sort of jumped at

262
00:13:08.759 --> 00:13:12.960
least a decade ahead in my sort of recognition of

263
00:13:13.000 --> 00:13:16.279
the fact that the only person that needed to be

264
00:13:16.399 --> 00:13:20.159
satisfied with my effort was actually me and that I

265
00:13:20.200 --> 00:13:23.600
didn't have to sort of perform, although I did spend

266
00:13:24.320 --> 00:13:27.039
a lot of time feeling like I had to perform

267
00:13:27.200 --> 00:13:29.559
as you were mentioning in the world of men, and

268
00:13:29.639 --> 00:13:31.759
it took a great therapist to help me unpack that.

269
00:13:31.799 --> 00:13:33.879
I wish I had done that earlier. I mean, that

270
00:13:33.919 --> 00:13:36.720
would be something I would do different, go to therapy early.

271
00:13:37.120 --> 00:13:39.840
But yes, I think I got lucky. So like this

272
00:13:39.879 --> 00:13:42.000
book that I wrote was sort of like I kind

273
00:13:42.039 --> 00:13:44.720
of got to learn these things at an early age,

274
00:13:45.240 --> 00:13:47.559
and it really helped me. I would love for you

275
00:13:47.600 --> 00:13:49.639
to learn them at an early age so that it

276
00:13:49.840 --> 00:13:52.720
could really help you. And that's who the sort of

277
00:13:53.360 --> 00:13:56.120
book is intended for. It's called The Fairy God Doctor's

278
00:13:56.159 --> 00:13:58.440
Guide to a Good Life. I'm like the fairy godmom

279
00:13:58.519 --> 00:14:01.360
to a lot of fabulous women out there, kind of

280
00:14:01.399 --> 00:14:05.440
ages forty to you know, down to twenty. What could

281
00:14:05.480 --> 00:14:09.120
I tell my fairy god daughters here, Here's here's the

282
00:14:09.159 --> 00:14:14.440
way forward. Here's a fast the fast track to actual satisfaction,

283
00:14:14.639 --> 00:14:16.279
because that's what I think we're all looking for in

284
00:14:16.320 --> 00:14:16.639
the end.

285
00:14:17.240 --> 00:14:20.639
On that note, think of what doctor Denis just said.

286
00:14:21.000 --> 00:14:23.000
We're going to take a quick break to say thanks

287
00:14:23.039 --> 00:14:25.879
to our supporters, and we'll be back here in just

288
00:14:26.000 --> 00:14:28.120
a moment. On the Word of Mom Radio.

289
00:14:28.360 --> 00:14:32.559
She is brave, she is bold, she is you, and

290
00:14:32.639 --> 00:14:35.679
we want to tell your story. Are you ready to

291
00:14:35.840 --> 00:14:39.240
share your journey with us on Word of Mom Radio?

292
00:14:39.679 --> 00:14:43.759
Go to wordommradio dot com and register as a guest.

293
00:14:44.159 --> 00:14:47.039
We want to tell your story because when you win,

294
00:14:47.440 --> 00:14:48.320
we all win.

295
00:14:48.559 --> 00:14:54.639
In twenty seventeen, Unsilenced Voices was formed to help survivors

296
00:14:54.679 --> 00:15:00.200
of domestic abuse and gender based violence worldwide. The organization

297
00:15:00.399 --> 00:15:06.039
currently serves sierri Leone, Rwanda, Ghana, and the USA. In

298
00:15:06.080 --> 00:15:10.720
twenty twenty two, Unsilenced Voices gifted over thirty three thousand

299
00:15:10.759 --> 00:15:14.480
dollars to survivors in the USA and in siri Leone.

300
00:15:14.679 --> 00:15:17.879
There are over twenty six young girls who have been

301
00:15:17.960 --> 00:15:22.480
rescued from sex trafficking and domestic abuse and now going

302
00:15:22.480 --> 00:15:26.279
through vocational training school in order to better their lives.

303
00:15:26.600 --> 00:15:30.879
We need your help. Donations are critical in order for

304
00:15:31.000 --> 00:15:35.039
us to continue our work. We also need volunteers to

305
00:15:35.159 --> 00:15:41.440
help with research and development. Please visit Unsilenced Voices dot

306
00:15:41.559 --> 00:15:43.159
org for more information.

307
00:15:43.600 --> 00:15:46.200
And we're back here on Word of Mom Radio. We

308
00:15:46.320 --> 00:15:51.600
are talking with doctor Denise Brown. And what you said

309
00:15:51.919 --> 00:15:54.919
is so important And I don't care how old you

310
00:15:55.120 --> 00:15:59.840
are when you finally learn that the only person union

311
00:16:00.080 --> 00:16:04.080
to satisfy is yourself, The only person who can live

312
00:16:04.159 --> 00:16:07.240
up to your own expectations is you, and the best

313
00:16:07.279 --> 00:16:10.000
you can hope for is to surround yourself with people

314
00:16:10.360 --> 00:16:13.639
to kind of have the same expectations out of things.

315
00:16:13.879 --> 00:16:16.559
But it's not your way and the wrong way. It's

316
00:16:16.639 --> 00:16:20.000
your way in somebody else's way. I laughed about the

317
00:16:20.039 --> 00:16:23.639
thing with your husband and the towels made me laugh

318
00:16:23.879 --> 00:16:29.120
so hard at the fact that after twenty six years,

319
00:16:29.240 --> 00:16:32.519
twenty eight years, this is how we fold the towels.

320
00:16:32.720 --> 00:16:34.919
But he's got his own way to fold the towel.

321
00:16:35.000 --> 00:16:37.840
So it's like, Okay, you can argue about it, you

322
00:16:37.879 --> 00:16:39.840
can read full the towel, you can leave the towel

323
00:16:39.879 --> 00:16:40.240
as it is.

324
00:16:40.279 --> 00:16:40.879
It's up to you.

325
00:16:41.480 --> 00:16:44.919
Yeah, whatever, and then my response might be different on

326
00:16:44.960 --> 00:16:47.919
any given day because you and I both know there's

327
00:16:48.000 --> 00:16:49.960
only one correct way to fold the towels.

328
00:16:50.080 --> 00:16:52.240
Thank you in thirds. I'm with you.

329
00:16:52.879 --> 00:16:55.960
It's the only way it fits right, that's it. But whatever,

330
00:16:56.240 --> 00:16:57.799
you know, it's so funny. It's like when my kids

331
00:16:57.879 --> 00:16:59.840
learned to make their beds. They started making their beds,

332
00:17:00.039 --> 00:17:02.000
they were two and a half years old. How does

333
00:17:02.039 --> 00:17:03.799
a two year old make their bed? They throw the

334
00:17:03.840 --> 00:17:08.640
cover on it. I resisted the temptation of smoothing it out,

335
00:17:09.680 --> 00:17:11.480
so by the time they were four and a half,

336
00:17:11.559 --> 00:17:13.440
money bounce a quarter off my bed.

337
00:17:13.519 --> 00:17:14.000
I got my.

338
00:17:14.039 --> 00:17:17.480
Hospital quarters done. They were proud of it. So when

339
00:17:17.519 --> 00:17:20.039
they folded their laundry, how did the kids pold their laundry?

340
00:17:20.079 --> 00:17:22.519
They crumple it up, so anything I didn't want wrinkled,

341
00:17:22.519 --> 00:17:25.920
I put in the closet. But then by the time

342
00:17:25.960 --> 00:17:28.720
they were five, they'd smooth it out, they'd poled it up.

343
00:17:28.799 --> 00:17:30.920
They got really proud at how they could pull the

344
00:17:30.960 --> 00:17:33.759
shirt like mommy, does you know? And it's doing the

345
00:17:33.799 --> 00:17:35.759
same thing to yourself as you get older.

346
00:17:36.240 --> 00:17:39.799
Well, I think you're right, and it's really interesting because sadly,

347
00:17:40.119 --> 00:17:43.720
our world is really focused on outcome, Right, what does

348
00:17:43.759 --> 00:17:46.960
a shirt look like when what we really want to reward,

349
00:17:47.160 --> 00:17:49.640
both in terms of like, let mean, let's be honest,

350
00:17:49.680 --> 00:17:51.440
our spouses, our.

351
00:17:51.359 --> 00:17:54.119
Children, and our employees. I mean, because it's all kind

352
00:17:54.119 --> 00:17:54.799
of the same, right.

353
00:17:54.720 --> 00:17:59.160
We want to actually reward process. We want to reward effort.

354
00:17:59.319 --> 00:18:01.799
And when you sort of are quiet and you let

355
00:18:01.799 --> 00:18:04.599
people figure it out, you get to the outcome that

356
00:18:04.640 --> 00:18:08.319
you actually want way faster than if you were cracking

357
00:18:08.319 --> 00:18:10.839
the whip. Your kids learned how to make their beds

358
00:18:11.640 --> 00:18:14.119
way faster than if you had been nagging them every

359
00:18:14.200 --> 00:18:16.519
day to do it like that, right, and so.

360
00:18:16.920 --> 00:18:20.279
It allows people to have this self of self.

361
00:18:20.000 --> 00:18:26.519
Agency that the kind of nitpicking micromanagement never ever achieves, right,

362
00:18:26.519 --> 00:18:29.559
because then people are just doing the bare minimum because

363
00:18:29.559 --> 00:18:31.759
they're only like, well, she's gonna pick it apart anyway,

364
00:18:32.079 --> 00:18:34.519
she's not gonna you know, like I'm never gonna win.

365
00:18:35.200 --> 00:18:37.799
That's like this kind of toxicity that none of us need.

366
00:18:37.920 --> 00:18:40.920
Right when you sort of say, instead you narrate, look

367
00:18:40.960 --> 00:18:45.039
at you, you made your bed, move right along, Look

368
00:18:45.079 --> 00:18:48.599
at me, the towels are folded that I'm not commenting

369
00:18:48.680 --> 00:18:51.480
on how it happened. I'm just sort of acknowledging that

370
00:18:51.559 --> 00:18:54.240
it happened. I'm pleased that it happened. And then little

371
00:18:54.240 --> 00:18:56.480
by little people want to get better at stuff. Right

372
00:18:56.480 --> 00:18:59.599
they look, they're observant. I mean, we know kids watch

373
00:19:00.119 --> 00:19:01.039
and learn by.

374
00:19:01.359 --> 00:19:02.519
With their eyes, you know.

375
00:19:02.599 --> 00:19:05.440
And so, but what a great lesson to absorb. Not

376
00:19:05.599 --> 00:19:07.119
that I'm going to come in and fix it for you.

377
00:19:07.119 --> 00:19:09.119
I'm not going to snowplow all of this stuff for you.

378
00:19:09.920 --> 00:19:14.559
I know that you are capable, and I am very

379
00:19:14.599 --> 00:19:18.680
thrilled at your capabilities. Look at you go, that's it,

380
00:19:18.880 --> 00:19:21.559
not you did a good job or you didn't do

381
00:19:21.640 --> 00:19:23.920
a good you know, there's no good, there's no judgment.

382
00:19:24.000 --> 00:19:26.079
It's look at your capabilities.

383
00:19:26.119 --> 00:19:29.799
Allow your kids, your employees or whoever, your friends to

384
00:19:29.839 --> 00:19:32.400
sort of be like, yeah, look at my capability.

385
00:19:32.440 --> 00:19:36.079
It's such an it's so easy to do. Words are

386
00:19:36.079 --> 00:19:39.759
so powerful. It's such an easy trick. It's not really

387
00:19:39.799 --> 00:19:42.680
a trick to just be like, look at what you've

388
00:19:42.759 --> 00:19:43.920
just done.

389
00:19:43.960 --> 00:19:48.319
That's right, and it's amazing. Words too harder than a fist. Yep,

390
00:19:48.519 --> 00:19:49.279
they really do.

391
00:19:49.440 --> 00:19:50.599
And it's as.

392
00:19:50.400 --> 00:19:53.119
A talk show host, as somebody who I listened to

393
00:19:53.200 --> 00:19:56.759
women talk themselves out of their dreams all the time, constantly.

394
00:19:57.079 --> 00:19:58.640
I was sitting there with a friend of mine one

395
00:19:58.680 --> 00:20:01.200
time who was ripping her else from one side.

396
00:20:01.000 --> 00:20:01.359
To the other.

397
00:20:01.400 --> 00:20:03.160
She and her daughter, and I was sitting there and

398
00:20:03.240 --> 00:20:05.000
I looked at her, I said, how dare you talk

399
00:20:05.039 --> 00:20:08.720
about my friend like that? And her daughter would, yeah,

400
00:20:08.960 --> 00:20:11.720
stop talking about my mom like that. And I said

401
00:20:11.759 --> 00:20:13.920
to her, I said, if you were listening to me

402
00:20:14.279 --> 00:20:18.880
say these things about myself, I should absolutely hope that

403
00:20:18.960 --> 00:20:22.359
you would jump up and defend me instead of getting

404
00:20:22.359 --> 00:20:24.720
a hammer and keep and hitting me as hard as

405
00:20:24.720 --> 00:20:29.400
I'm hitting myself, because oh my gosh, you know, it's amazing.

406
00:20:29.519 --> 00:20:34.079
And we judge ourselves by other people's looks. Their cars,

407
00:20:34.119 --> 00:20:37.440
they're this, they're that. Those are things, and at the

408
00:20:37.559 --> 00:20:41.880
end of the day, things are nothing but things.

409
00:20:42.160 --> 00:20:43.160
Yeah, I can't take it with you.

410
00:20:43.319 --> 00:20:46.240
That's that's exactly right, you know, no matter what.

411
00:20:46.480 --> 00:20:49.720
So I want to get into your book, The Fairy

412
00:20:49.799 --> 00:20:52.720
God Doctor's Guide to a Good Life. It is a

413
00:20:53.000 --> 00:20:57.400
really fun book, it really is. It's a quick read.

414
00:20:57.559 --> 00:21:00.680
But let me tell you, ladies, this is something you

415
00:21:00.799 --> 00:21:06.359
should read. I highly recommend this book. I truly do,

416
00:21:06.480 --> 00:21:09.599
because you know what it gives you permission to be you.

417
00:21:09.599 --> 00:21:12.240
You're not trying to tell people how to fix themselves

418
00:21:12.359 --> 00:21:16.200
or anything else. What you're doing is great, you know.

419
00:21:16.319 --> 00:21:21.039
And it's accepting taking the good, the bad, the everything

420
00:21:21.119 --> 00:21:23.680
and just putting it all together because it's part of who.

421
00:21:23.519 --> 00:21:25.000
You are right now.

422
00:21:25.480 --> 00:21:28.799
You're right now because we were talking about this before

423
00:21:28.839 --> 00:21:31.559
we started. I saw something and it means a lot.

424
00:21:32.279 --> 00:21:35.680
The two times things nothing that you can't do anything

425
00:21:35.680 --> 00:21:39.960
and it doesn't matter. Is tomorrow and yesterday. You can't

426
00:21:39.960 --> 00:21:41.240
do anything about them.

427
00:21:41.599 --> 00:21:42.000
That's it.

428
00:21:43.079 --> 00:21:47.039
You've got today. And it's about taking the lessons. You

429
00:21:47.039 --> 00:21:49.839
don't win and lose, you win and learn. So let's

430
00:21:49.880 --> 00:21:52.400
talk about what made you write the book and what

431
00:21:52.599 --> 00:21:54.319
was the best part of it for you.

432
00:21:54.960 --> 00:21:55.839
Oh that's so fun.

433
00:21:55.880 --> 00:21:58.759
Well, so, like I was telling you, I had this

434
00:21:58.960 --> 00:22:04.000
health tech company and we sold it, and I was like,

435
00:22:04.160 --> 00:22:06.319
I'm going to take some time off. I'd never ever

436
00:22:06.440 --> 00:22:09.079
taken any time off in my entire life. I mean,

437
00:22:09.119 --> 00:22:12.920
I went straight through everything, and I was like, I

438
00:22:12.960 --> 00:22:15.359
have the luxury of taking a little bit of time,

439
00:22:15.480 --> 00:22:17.279
Like this is going to be really cool.

440
00:22:17.799 --> 00:22:19.279
And I think I had these sort of you know,

441
00:22:19.440 --> 00:22:21.359
like grandiose visions of.

442
00:22:21.319 --> 00:22:22.920
What I was going to do with that anyway. By

443
00:22:22.920 --> 00:22:24.960
about three months in, I was bored out of my

444
00:22:25.000 --> 00:22:28.599
mind and I was like, Okay, what are we doing next?

445
00:22:29.160 --> 00:22:33.200
And I got interviewed for a magazine and they were like, well,

446
00:22:33.200 --> 00:22:36.079
what's your legacy? And I was like, what are you

447
00:22:36.119 --> 00:22:38.960
talking about? She's like, well, what's your legacy? I said?

448
00:22:39.039 --> 00:22:42.000
Are you referring to my work and legacy? Like I

449
00:22:42.000 --> 00:22:44.200
was like I'm sorry, I don't understand the question. And

450
00:22:44.240 --> 00:22:46.480
she's like, well, yeah, your legacy at work. And I said, oh,

451
00:22:46.519 --> 00:22:49.839
that's fascinating. I don't think of legacy and work as

452
00:22:49.880 --> 00:22:53.519
remotely related. And she was like, wait what And I

453
00:22:53.599 --> 00:22:56.000
was like, oh, perhaps you interview a lot of men.

454
00:22:56.240 --> 00:22:58.200
I'm like, I don't know. I mean, I'm curious.

455
00:22:58.359 --> 00:23:01.240
I said, my legacy are the people I'm feel better period,

456
00:23:01.519 --> 00:23:04.000
whether I someone I make laugh on the street, or

457
00:23:04.039 --> 00:23:07.079
it's a patient that I had the you know, ability

458
00:23:07.119 --> 00:23:09.200
to care for, or it's my kid or whatever, like,

459
00:23:09.240 --> 00:23:10.519
if I could make you feel.

460
00:23:10.279 --> 00:23:12.240
A little bit better, that's my legacy.

461
00:23:12.519 --> 00:23:14.519
And I was like, so that's not really something that

462
00:23:15.079 --> 00:23:16.559
I'm not sure you could write a lot about that.

463
00:23:16.640 --> 00:23:18.599
And she's like, oh, I want to hear a lot

464
00:23:18.680 --> 00:23:21.279
more about that. And so anyway, we get started talking

465
00:23:21.359 --> 00:23:22.920
and how did I come up with?

466
00:23:23.240 --> 00:23:24.720
You know, why am I where I'm at? And how

467
00:23:24.759 --> 00:23:26.000
have I done the things I've done?

468
00:23:26.519 --> 00:23:29.279
And she was probably about thirty five, and she was like,

469
00:23:30.079 --> 00:23:31.640
could you please just write this down for me?

470
00:23:31.720 --> 00:23:33.240
And I was like, oh, that's funny, you know.

471
00:23:33.319 --> 00:23:36.000
And two weeks later, someone else, same kind of a scenario,

472
00:23:36.039 --> 00:23:37.759
was like, I think you need to write the stuff down.

473
00:23:37.799 --> 00:23:39.839
And I was like, Okay, the universe is telling me.

474
00:23:40.240 --> 00:23:43.079
That I'm supposed to write my prescriptions for a good

475
00:23:43.119 --> 00:23:45.680
life down, so I'm not.

476
00:23:45.640 --> 00:23:48.359
Doing anything else. Let's figure out how to write a book.

477
00:23:48.440 --> 00:23:51.839
And I had this imagining sort of you know again,

478
00:23:52.119 --> 00:23:54.400
very sort of like, oh, I wonder I'm like, oh,

479
00:23:54.480 --> 00:23:56.559
I'm supposed to make my tea and sit down and

480
00:23:56.599 --> 00:23:59.880
write two thousand words every morning. And that lasted about

481
00:23:59.880 --> 00:24:02.559
four days because that is not how I roll.

482
00:24:03.000 --> 00:24:05.720
I'm an index card person. I've stud I went, I

483
00:24:05.759 --> 00:24:08.319
put myself through college and med school and residency and

484
00:24:08.359 --> 00:24:10.720
all the tests and all the things on index cards.

485
00:24:10.720 --> 00:24:13.000
And so I was like, all right, well, perhaps I'll

486
00:24:13.039 --> 00:24:15.079
just write myself some index cards. So I thought like,

487
00:24:15.279 --> 00:24:19.039
here are my seven prescriptions. I think, let me think

488
00:24:19.079 --> 00:24:21.160
about what that looks like. And then I went walking

489
00:24:21.200 --> 00:24:23.920
and I just sort of started recording myself talking about

490
00:24:24.000 --> 00:24:27.920
these things as I was walking and then coming back

491
00:24:27.960 --> 00:24:30.079
and you know, editing it and whatnot on the on

492
00:24:30.119 --> 00:24:30.599
the computer.

493
00:24:30.640 --> 00:24:33.960
And that worked out a lot more. Uh. It made

494
00:24:34.000 --> 00:24:34.400
a lot.

495
00:24:34.279 --> 00:24:37.079
More sense using like a transcript like Otner to like

496
00:24:37.160 --> 00:24:39.359
transcribe my book. And so one of the things I

497
00:24:39.400 --> 00:24:41.160
love about it is people go, oh, my god, your

498
00:24:41.200 --> 00:24:43.000
book is so fun to read. It's like just having

499
00:24:43.000 --> 00:24:46.440
a conversation with you. And I'm like, well, that's why,

500
00:24:46.480 --> 00:24:48.440
because I was having a conversation with myself.

501
00:24:50.559 --> 00:24:52.839
So that was actually the most fun. I really.

502
00:24:53.799 --> 00:24:56.880
It was interesting to kind of look back to kind

503
00:24:56.880 --> 00:25:00.480
of be like, oh, I made some very creative, weird

504
00:25:00.599 --> 00:25:02.200
choices when I was a resident.

505
00:25:02.720 --> 00:25:06.559
I left Stanford to go to Vanderbilt.

506
00:25:05.960 --> 00:25:09.640
Because my husband hadn't moved, like he'd finished his degree

507
00:25:09.720 --> 00:25:13.359
faster than we expected, and people just don't do that.

508
00:25:13.359 --> 00:25:15.960
That's still not a thing, you know, some almost thirty

509
00:25:16.000 --> 00:25:16.519
years later.

510
00:25:17.519 --> 00:25:19.480
But what mattered to me was like being with the

511
00:25:19.519 --> 00:25:21.759
people I loved, cause my mom had just died like

512
00:25:21.799 --> 00:25:24.759
a year and a half before that, and I was like, yeah, no,

513
00:25:24.880 --> 00:25:28.839
this is I don't really care. Stanford's great, Vanderbilt's great.

514
00:25:28.880 --> 00:25:31.599
It doesn't that's not actually what matters. What matters is

515
00:25:31.599 --> 00:25:33.960
that I'm with the person I care about. So I'm

516
00:25:34.200 --> 00:25:36.599
willing to do that, and I'm not giving anything up

517
00:25:36.640 --> 00:25:38.480
by it. I think I think the sort of like

518
00:25:39.279 --> 00:25:42.480
you know, old antique version of feminism would.

519
00:25:42.240 --> 00:25:45.720
Be like, oh, you sacrificed something for them. No, I didn't.

520
00:25:45.759 --> 00:25:48.119
I got exactly what I wanted, which was to be

521
00:25:48.200 --> 00:25:49.920
with the person I care most about in the world.

522
00:25:49.960 --> 00:25:52.680
So who lost their not me.

523
00:25:53.119 --> 00:25:55.759
So I made some interesting choices and when you sort

524
00:25:55.759 --> 00:25:58.200
of like sit down to start thinking about it, you're.

525
00:25:58.079 --> 00:26:01.319
Like, oh, yeah, oh.

526
00:26:00.200 --> 00:26:03.039
That's also interesting, Like, oh, I decided to only hire

527
00:26:03.119 --> 00:26:07.720
working women, working moms as fellow doctors because we all

528
00:26:07.759 --> 00:26:10.880
wanted to be around for certain things, you know, and

529
00:26:11.039 --> 00:26:13.440
we all kind of plugged in the holes differently, like

530
00:26:13.680 --> 00:26:15.000
and it worked out great.

531
00:26:15.240 --> 00:26:15.440
You know.

532
00:26:15.519 --> 00:26:17.960
It's that whole adage like give a busy working mom

533
00:26:18.039 --> 00:26:20.160
something to do and it'll be done, you know later today.

534
00:26:20.440 --> 00:26:23.000
I don't think I realized in the moment the kind

535
00:26:23.039 --> 00:26:26.440
of choices that I was making. But when I had

536
00:26:26.480 --> 00:26:28.799
an opportunity, and it was a real treat to look

537
00:26:28.839 --> 00:26:31.319
back on them and be like, oh, well that was unconventional.

538
00:26:31.680 --> 00:26:35.160
It was also unconventional perhouse. There's a theme here, you know.

539
00:26:35.279 --> 00:26:37.680
So so it was really it was actually really fun.

540
00:26:38.000 --> 00:26:40.200
It was really fun to write, you know what.

541
00:26:40.319 --> 00:26:43.000
And it was what I loved that when you talked

542
00:26:43.000 --> 00:26:48.839
about your practice and how you went to other doctors

543
00:26:49.279 --> 00:26:54.359
who were moms with young kids, who could understand everything

544
00:26:54.440 --> 00:26:58.480
going on, because you know, let's face it, men's lives,

545
00:26:58.559 --> 00:27:03.400
most men's lives do not change because they've become a father. Yeah,

546
00:27:03.680 --> 00:27:06.880
Women's lives are the ones who are supposed to be

547
00:27:07.200 --> 00:27:11.279
upheaved and everything else is faced. Men abandon children all

548
00:27:11.319 --> 00:27:13.720
the time. But if a woman walks out, oh forget it,

549
00:27:13.759 --> 00:27:17.960
they're coming after her, you know. So I loved that,

550
00:27:18.160 --> 00:27:20.799
And as you were talking, it made me think of

551
00:27:20.839 --> 00:27:24.240
this cartoon that I saw of this woman going back

552
00:27:24.240 --> 00:27:27.039
to work and the woman interviewing her said, we need

553
00:27:27.079 --> 00:27:29.200
you to do the job of three men, and she goes, ooh,

554
00:27:29.319 --> 00:27:30.359
it's only part time.

555
00:27:32.440 --> 00:27:32.960
I love that.

556
00:27:33.400 --> 00:27:37.599
I mean, you know it is. Stereotypes are true, probably

557
00:27:37.599 --> 00:27:38.119
for a reason.

558
00:27:38.480 --> 00:27:39.680
I mean, being a woman.

559
00:27:39.519 --> 00:27:41.799
Let's all admit it's very interesting, right, I mean, our

560
00:27:41.799 --> 00:27:47.599
bodies changed dramatically many times over the course of our lives, right,

561
00:27:47.720 --> 00:27:50.200
and you know I have two boys, so I mean

562
00:27:50.240 --> 00:27:52.400
I can tell you they were very stinky in like

563
00:27:52.480 --> 00:27:55.720
the fifth grade, but like now they're essentially what they

564
00:27:55.759 --> 00:27:59.400
are sort of biologically until they're you know, eighty. I mean,

565
00:27:59.400 --> 00:28:02.319
look at Robert de Niro, right, whereas I've been at

566
00:28:02.400 --> 00:28:06.960
least three different people, right right, I'm the maiden, I'm

567
00:28:07.000 --> 00:28:07.720
the mother, and.

568
00:28:07.799 --> 00:28:10.039
Now I'm coming into macron era baby.

569
00:28:10.079 --> 00:28:15.319
But like, like it's just even biologically physiologically, like we

570
00:28:15.519 --> 00:28:20.480
are different people along our journey, and so to try

571
00:28:20.519 --> 00:28:22.359
to pretend like, oh, I'm just going to do it

572
00:28:22.400 --> 00:28:24.400
the way the guys do it, Like screw that.

573
00:28:24.759 --> 00:28:25.960
I mean that makes no sense.

574
00:28:26.119 --> 00:28:29.319
Like I can harness the power of all of these

575
00:28:29.319 --> 00:28:31.480
other generations of women who've gone before me.

576
00:28:31.599 --> 00:28:33.519
I mean, I'd be silly not to.

577
00:28:34.759 --> 00:28:38.599
You know what, we're life givers. So it's absolutely silly

578
00:28:38.720 --> 00:28:42.400
not to harness this. Yeah, as we're wrapping up, doctor Denise,

579
00:28:42.880 --> 00:28:45.720
what do you want to leave our listeners with and

580
00:28:45.880 --> 00:28:47.359
how may they reach out to you?

581
00:28:47.960 --> 00:28:48.119
Oh?

582
00:28:48.160 --> 00:28:48.559
I love it?

583
00:28:48.599 --> 00:28:50.200
Well, I mean I think it would be awesome if

584
00:28:50.240 --> 00:28:53.000
you bought the book, because, like you said, Dory, it

585
00:28:53.079 --> 00:28:55.960
is a pretty quick read on audible. If you do

586
00:28:56.039 --> 00:28:58.920
it at like a one and a half speed, it's

587
00:28:58.960 --> 00:29:02.039
like three hours, so like it's quick and easy.

588
00:29:02.079 --> 00:29:03.039
I think it is packed.

589
00:29:03.079 --> 00:29:05.160
I hate business books where you're like, oh, the beginning

590
00:29:05.240 --> 00:29:06.640
was great, and the end was great, and then the

591
00:29:06.680 --> 00:29:10.200
middle was like I tried to pack it full of

592
00:29:10.359 --> 00:29:11.559
good stuff all the way through.

593
00:29:12.200 --> 00:29:16.200
So I would love that because I do feel like we're.

594
00:29:16.000 --> 00:29:19.720
All too hard on ourselves and you can give yourself

595
00:29:19.720 --> 00:29:22.000
permission to go ask for help and be a little

596
00:29:22.000 --> 00:29:24.240
more creative and how you do that, So I think

597
00:29:24.240 --> 00:29:25.039
we all deserve that.

598
00:29:25.759 --> 00:29:28.920
You can find me at my website. It's Denise S

599
00:29:29.240 --> 00:29:30.559
like Sam Brown, MD.

600
00:29:31.599 --> 00:29:34.039
You can find my book at Amazon or Barnes and

601
00:29:34.039 --> 00:29:36.799
Noble or all the usual spots that you might find

602
00:29:36.920 --> 00:29:37.359
a book.

603
00:29:37.880 --> 00:29:39.440
And yeah, I hope you read it.

604
00:29:39.480 --> 00:29:41.400
I hope you give it to a girlfriend, and I

605
00:29:41.400 --> 00:29:44.519
hope you start a supper club. I hope you stop

606
00:29:44.960 --> 00:29:48.079
comparing yourself to everybody else and just recognize you for

607
00:29:48.119 --> 00:29:49.240
the powerful being.

608
00:29:49.039 --> 00:29:49.480
That you are.

609
00:29:50.079 --> 00:29:53.400
And yeah, just go forth and have fun. I mean,

610
00:29:53.759 --> 00:29:56.160
we only get this one life, Like, why not make

611
00:29:56.200 --> 00:29:57.920
it as packful of joy as possible?

612
00:29:58.480 --> 00:29:59.200
Right on?

613
00:29:59.440 --> 00:30:02.440
You know, that's when people say, oh, life is so hard.

614
00:30:02.480 --> 00:30:07.279
I'm like, it's not compared to what I mean. Seriously,

615
00:30:07.720 --> 00:30:08.440
it's gonna be.

616
00:30:08.440 --> 00:30:12.240
Really crappy sometimes sure, but you can als. You can

617
00:30:12.279 --> 00:30:13.319
always bring the light.

618
00:30:13.519 --> 00:30:14.680
So that's exactly right.

619
00:30:14.920 --> 00:30:18.599
I mean, you live every day, you only die once, like,

620
00:30:19.000 --> 00:30:22.119
so you have to this is it? Make your best

621
00:30:22.160 --> 00:30:25.759
today you can, and you know what, make tomorrow When

622
00:30:25.759 --> 00:30:29.319
tomorrow gets here, guess what it's today. So just keep

623
00:30:29.359 --> 00:30:32.920
focused on today and it's gonna keep going. I loved

624
00:30:33.039 --> 00:30:36.240
your book. I hope everybody, ladies, I'm telling you, we'll

625
00:30:36.240 --> 00:30:39.920
get the book. No, you know what we need the

626
00:30:40.160 --> 00:30:44.920
positive reinforcement that this book gives that self care is

627
00:30:45.119 --> 00:30:50.519
not selfish. No, that you don't have to do what

628
00:30:50.599 --> 00:30:53.319
anybody else does. You have to do what's.

629
00:30:53.160 --> 00:30:55.200
Right for you, you.

630
00:30:55.160 --> 00:30:58.559
Know, And it really is. It's very conversational. It's really

631
00:30:58.599 --> 00:31:01.000
you're going to get into the flow of this where

632
00:31:01.039 --> 00:31:03.240
you really do feel like you're chatting with you. So

633
00:31:03.640 --> 00:31:06.920
I thank you so much for taking your time to

634
00:31:07.000 --> 00:31:09.599
her your awesome journey. Come back when you write your

635
00:31:09.599 --> 00:31:13.079
next book, because I'm sure there's something else coming out,

636
00:31:13.640 --> 00:31:15.240
and thanks and for all.

637
00:31:15.079 --> 00:31:17.559
Of you tuning in, thank you so much for being here.

638
00:31:17.599 --> 00:31:20.920
We're going to close out with our fabulous theme song

639
00:31:21.000 --> 00:31:24.799
from Smith's Sisters and the Sunday Drivers. So till next time,

640
00:31:24.920 --> 00:31:27.680
This is Dori di Carlo saying, go out and create

641
00:31:27.720 --> 00:31:28.559
a marvelous youth.

642
00:31:29.000 --> 00:31:29.720
Bye for now.

643
00:31:32.720 --> 00:31:35.279
She is sure, she is sure, she is strong, she

644
00:31:35.359 --> 00:31:40.440
is strong, she is true, is true, she is Brazra,

645
00:31:40.680 --> 00:31:45.599
she is she is you, is you, she is she

646
00:31:45.680 --> 00:31:48.599
is sure, she is sure, she is strong, she is strong,

647
00:31:48.640 --> 00:31:54.240
she is true, true, she is brave, she is she

648
00:31:55.319 --> 00:31:55.559
is you.

649
00:31:55.799 --> 00:31:57.880
She is you, she is you.

650
00:31:58.480 --> 00:32:02.599
Sure of ourself, Yes, takes care of his powerful and strong.

651
00:32:02.880 --> 00:32:06.640
Yet she knows who she is, has integrity, woman, strong

652
00:32:06.720 --> 00:32:09.839
and true. You know where by name. See this woman

653
00:32:10.000 --> 00:32:13.759
is you. She is sure, she is strong, he is strong,

654
00:32:13.839 --> 00:32:18.720
she is true, is true, she is brave, brave, she

655
00:32:18.799 --> 00:32:21.480
is bold, she is she is you, she is you,

656
00:32:21.799 --> 00:32:26.480
she is she is sure, she is strong, is strong,

657
00:32:26.519 --> 00:32:31.720
she is true, is true, she is brave, she is

658
00:32:32.119 --> 00:32:35.400
she is she is you, she is she is She

659
00:32:36.119 --> 00:32:39.519
adds value and hope has proved to be brave. See

660
00:32:39.519 --> 00:32:43.359
it's never too late, never time to behave Reaching for

661
00:32:43.519 --> 00:32:48.039
dreams doesn't matter. The age believes in herself, unleash from

662
00:32:48.079 --> 00:32:51.119
her cage. She is sure, she is sure, she is strong,

663
00:32:51.400 --> 00:32:56.000
is strong, She is true, is true, She is brave,

664
00:32:56.839 --> 00:33:01.839
she is bold, She is you, is you? She she

665
00:33:01.920 --> 00:33:05.599
is sure, she is strong, she is strong, she is true,

666
00:33:05.880 --> 00:33:11.279
is true, She is brave, is brave, She is she

667
00:33:10.720 --> 00:33:11.839
is She is you.
Dr. Denise Brown Profile Photo
Dr. Denise Brown

Author / CEO / Mom

With over three decades of experience in healthcare as a physician, CEO and Chief Strategy Officer, Denise S. Brown, MD is a transformative leader who helps women in business learn how to prioritize and avoid maternal overwhelm. A thought leader in self-care activities for women, she brings her expertise to books for successful women. A graduate of The University of Chicago's Pritzker School of Medicine, with training at Stanford and Vanderbilt, she lives with Alex, her childhood sweetheart of 28 years, and their sons Will and Hank.